The Rise Before the fall.

 

    Today is: February 20, 2021 at 12pm.

        This morning I woke periodically for an hour then I went back to bed, I did this twice or so. Finally I woke at 8:30 am feeling a little confused. I just sat on my computer and listened to music and drank my coffee per usual. Finally 10am came along and I ate some some eggs and toast and threw some cheese on it to make a sandwich of some sorts. I then cleaned up the kitchen which was a quite a mess from the cat litter to the dishes and so on the list goes on. Never the less my home health care nurse comes into my apartment to give me my pills he started off with some smart ass comments that really didn't sit well with me.. so he filled my daily prescription container while I was doing the dishes … he then announced to me that I had to sign a document in regards to the health insurance and how he get payed or something like that. I didn't feel comfortable at all about it. I wanted to read it over and understand what I was signing which to my knowledge is and was a completely sane thing to do. he wasn't having any of it he got upset he got frustrated that I wouldn't sign this document blindly and allow him to have my signature. he then got into my face and about to hit me frustrated at the fact of how I felt. one thing led to another  I dried my hands and signed the computer tablet that basically says he administrated the medication today... and he would not let me hold on to the document to read and understand it and give it back to him tomorrow. so he stormed out of my apartment with one thing on his mind... MY MEAL TICKET ISN'T cooperating thus he is a mental case and belongs on the funny farm. right now I am just so emotionally exhausted from all this that I am just going to lay down and try to relax. as I am signing my life away I need to rest. 

    Well I just woke and listened to a podcast and started to draw on the computer for the most part. Just feeling drained emotionally about the entire ordeal. These feelings that are being brought to attention to only find out they are making people rich. I titled this post "The Rise before the Fall" am I just being brought to a feel of absolution only to fall and lose my apartment and my entire world that I am living in! I feel a break coming whether it be a good thing or bad thing I must of have grown too comfortable where I am. With all these words spoken only to myself, have I found my destiny yet or am I am still waiting … the world is watching me as I become a criminal of my own passions. My nurse really made me feel like they were going to lock me up in a mental institution soon. is it coming? is it my destiny ? I don't know what the future holds for me. but it seems like too many people that are in my life know more about my future better than I do!  

It's not done I am still working on it but I got to take it slow cause if I try to hurry up this digital sketch it will get ruined . I'll post the final outcome when I feel like its done.